“How do I really know if he is right for me” is a question so many females ask…at any age..and at any part of the relationship, and yes, even after they’ve been married 20 years!
Lots of it has to do with you, and what you want. But if you have fallen into this page because of Google or a random link, then I’m going to share with you on the more important question: How do I know if he is right for anyone:
- He has good parents or role models who not only have learned from their mistakes but have shared them with your future husband and now your future husband knows and understands these parental figure mistakes so that he can not do them himself and be able to verbalize them to you too. (so that you feel comfortable your future partner won’t make those mistakes either!)
- He makes you feel like you want to be the best verion of yourself.
- He helps you heal when you screwed up or make a mistake.
- He’s a mirror and shares with you the little things about yourself that you deny or defend but that you can learn from. (We all walk around all day being ourselves but our closest friend/lover can see negative things about us that we are completely unable to see.)
- He loves you unconditionally. (meaning he’s able to see your ‘shit’ and still like you!)
- He makes you feel safe.
- You let him love you. (Letting someone love you is not easy. It’s easy to give love and help others receive love, yet it’s so hard to accept love back sometimes.)
Marriage is not for the faint of heart… or the fearful of conflict. Marriages all have conflict, it’s complerely asinine to believe you can live with another human and share money and toothpaste together without a disagreement once in awhile.
My biggest take away from the 7 above is #1. If you as a marriage partner go into marriage and haven’t seen partners/couples/parents work thru a conflict and reach a solution, how in the heck would you know how to do it yourself or even believe it is possible?
Take a long look at this one. Problems will arise…no doubt…it’s what you do when that happens to know if someone is right for you.