Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater…? True? False?


Once a cheater, always a cheater?  Is it true? False?

Everyone has their opinion.  You have yours.  I have mine. It’s completely personal…and be careful of the girl/man that tells you “Once a cheater…always a cheater…” after you’ve been betrayed.

Once a cheater, always a cheater, appplies to the man (or woman) who when you meet him (or her!) has cheated repeatedly on past girlfriends.  Then, after you have been together for awhile and discover he’s still cheating.  Well, then…this applies.

The Faithful Guy:

But to the guy who has been faithful, who talks about cheating as bad and has no history of cheating, and then he suddenly finds some girl and he’s inspired to cheat, well, that guy does not fall under this “OCAC.”

Depending on the situation, this faithful guy may be in a MCL or just stupid.  So don’t give up on this guy.  No one is perfect, we all screw up sometimes. Even you, my dear reader!

A good faithful guy is not perfect.  Because he is human.  And one day, he just may have a moment of weakness and fall off that horse into a dark well of regret after he does something you nor he ever, ever expected.

If Your Man Has Cheated:

First be careful what you call it.  He may not be a serial cheater.  Or maybe he is. No one really knows him better than you.  You know him.  What do you think?

Of course there are these folks out there that when someone cheats, it’s game over.  Okay. Fine.  We all have our limits.  I know you don’t feel that way, because if you did you’d have stopped reading at the first paragraph.  In fact, you’d never ever have Googled this article in the first place.  And if it did pop up, you’d roll your eyes and move on quickly.

There are plenty of people on this planet that love drama, that love talking about the icky side of people, who they are and what they do wrong.  Any opportunity to get another person to join their negative team pow-wow is a bonus for the dark side.

Don’t go there.  Don’t go negative.  Stay positive.  Stay hopeful.  People can and do get their heads out of their ass after they cheated.  It just takes time.  Are you a person that believes we all have need ot have 2nd chances because we may get lost sometimes?  It happens.  It sucks, but it does happen.

cheating spouseWas Mine a Serial Cheater?

“Once a cheater, always a cheater” is so common, I actually repeatedly repeated it to myself the week after finding out my husband had been having an affair.

When I found out, I was done.  I believed that saying, that he would do it again.  And after all the lying and deceit thrown at me?  How could I ever trust him again?  He lied.  He lied to me.  The person he asked to marry him, share a life together, have babies with, build a home together.

He chose me and then he chose to lie to me to protect some skanky crazy girl (you have to be crazy if you choose to hook up with a man who is married with kids).  Some worthless woman (I’m going for it here!) who decided it was a good idea to get involved with a married man.

After Cheating Discovery:

During those first few weeks after I found out, my husband and I still lived together…both of us getting used to the new reality of…ick, what?  I didn’t know.  We had kids, jobs and crap to do.

At some point during this time, we were fixing dinner and he said to me that she was such a nice person, the nicest person he’d ever met.

I said nothing so he continued, “You should meet her, you’d really like her…all her friends think she’s so wonderful…”

“Hmm…” I said half to myself, half outloud.  Then inside my head the conversation was on fire, “Really?  That’s so odd, cause all my friends think I’m wonderful too!  I really do have so much in common with your girlfriend.  You really want me to meet her?  I’d rather poke out my eyes with a toe nail pick.

That was inside.  Outside I was quiet as I kept tossing the caesar salad.

I had so many questions.  Silly ones, stupid ones, gory detail needy ones.  Unlike most people out there who didn’t want to know a thing, I had to know any and all details so that my mind would stop wandering to the worst imaginable picture I’d already created in my mind.  (Remember I’m a writer?  My imagination works overtime, in nasty pictures too!)

Nightly it was an ongoing challenge. To sleep, to breath, to stop the questions as I lay awake for hours (sometimes the sun came up and I still hadn’t slept) attempting to piece together the giant web of who, what, where, when, why….stopping only to burst into tears wondering, “WTF?”

I couldn’t believe after all these years with my husband, he let his mind and life sway so far to the left that he had packed up his things, left our beautiful home he shared with me and our three kids, found a small 1 room shack and was now sleeping with another woman?

There was always so many pieces missing.  Things I just couldn’t wrap my head around.  He faced so many struggles at this time: death of relatives, unhappiness with his new boss, his job, he kept making comments about his body, his hair, his age.

Yet this choice, this implosion of our immediate family, that we built together, was the best solution he could come up with to cope with the personal struggles he faced?

If Cheating Happened Today?

Knowing what I know now.  I wouldn’t have said what I said back then, “I’m done….(wait for it…) Once a cheater, always a cheater!”

cheating spouseHe wants out to be with this new girl?  Fine.  Go.  Done.  After all, my hubby was the product of a fourth marriage, and abandoned children and wives from the previous marriages, follow the leader.  Why would that apple fall far from his family tree?

I’m happy to let him go so he could cheat and and cheat and carry on his secrets and lies without me.  I was moving on to find a normal, kind, nice man..who had good, kind loving parents and who rode in on a horse.  Yeah.  Right.  I know there are good ones out there, however, no one wants a depressed, slumpy, sweatshirt wearing, mini-van driving Mommy?  The chance that some hot guy was hiding in the corner Starbucks waiting for me in Los Angeles was slim.

I did meet a ton of nice, good-looking men during this time of separation, who, when you asked them about their previous marriage the first thing out of their mouth, “Well…she…blah, blah, blah…”  Notice how when you ask this question to either a man or woman, “What happened to your first marriage…?”  RARELY does the person answering say, “I just was a dick.  An ass.  I ruined her/his life…”  No one says that.  Because it’s always the other guy’s fault.  So they answer with, “She/He…..” and the story builds by itself.

cheating spouseSo “once a cheater always a cheater…?”  Maybe.  If they never learn their lesson?  Yes.  Because if they aren’t a narcissist, at some point it will occur to them that cheating actually hurts another.

If you’ve had that comment flash through your mind too.  I’m sorry.  It sucks.  But each and every day that goes by…it gets better.  Easier.  Keep the faith.  Keep going.

Hope these quotes make you feel better…or at least laugh, knowing other people (other funny people) have been there too.

Want him back?  I’m here to help:

Or thewifeexpert @ gmail . com (just take out the spaces!)

Maria: Found Her Husband With Another Woman: Solution

What To Do With The Other Woman

My Turn For An Affair?

What To Do When He Says, “I Love You But I’m Not In Love With You Anymore…”

How To Forgive: The Story of Inez and Charlie


  1. I’ve been absent for some time, but now I remember why I used to love this blog. Thanks , I¦ll try and check back more frequently. How frequently you update your site?

  2. dating site instance introductions most recent ability

    TINDER provides legally took following one stage further.

    The software just produced a new product labelled as which one tracks every and every open to the public storage you been in due to dining establishments to the gym to a nearby grocery [url=http://www.love-sites.com/have-sex-with-russian-girl-on-first-date-possible-or-not/]russian brides[/url] but [url=http://www.love-sites.com/know-exactly-how-to-meet-sexy-colombian-women-online/]sexy colombian[/url] logs onto you with people who have been in the exact situation. [url=http://www.love-sites.com/chinese-mail-order-brides-everything-you-need-to-know-about-chinese-dating/]sexy chinese women[/url] understand it fueled using Foursquare, research online and as well,as well as the finding work software package which probably understands criminal court gaps.

    You not just have something in keeping, you then have a genuine icebreaker and very first [url=http://www.love-sites.com/how-to-successfully-date-a-vietnamese-woman/]dating a vietnamese woman[/url] marry location, relates Tinder on the it has the page.

    idea is recreate significantly more suitable contacts and good quality conversations, agreed Samantha Stevens, an request director associated vacation destination programs.

    Tinder is not the first request to attach males by way of their location. Happn actually works in the same way, binding individuals who walk previous years some other long time drenched in the gift software package.

    it all certainly sensible, nevertheless, there a tad crazy on the subject of hearing the posts owners strolled to over the past day drenched and as well,as well as the recorded on a guide. this might be a stalker fantasy.

    using the a new relationship iphone app, personalised places for instance like creditors, health practitioner working and your workplace aren’t joint.

    say you decided to quite suspicious depending on the data scandal environment facebook or twitter the fact that links to actually Tinder fear not. unquestionably the also facet in doing this is that you have to opt-in, professionals who log in select and also different opportunity.

  3. First off I would like to say fantastic blog! I had a quick question which I’d like to ask if
    you don’t mind. I was curious to find out how
    you center yourself and clear your head before writing.
    I’ve had a difficult time clearing my mind in getting my ideas out there.

    I truly do take pleasure in writing however it just seems
    like the first 10 to 15 minutes are usually wasted simply just trying to figure out how to begin. Any ideas or tips?
    Appreciate it!

  4. Yesterday, while I was at work, my cousin stole my apple ipad and tested to
    see if it can survive a 30 foot drop, just so she
    can be a youtube sensation. My apple ipad is now destroyed and she has 83 views.
    I know this is entirely off topic but I had to share it with someone!

  5. I am curious to find out what blog platform you’re utilizing?
    I’m experiencing some small security problems with my latest website
    and I would like to find something more secure.
    Do you have any suggestions?

  6. I am really impressed with your writing skills and also with the layout
    on your weblog. Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself?

    Either way keep up the nice quality writing, it’s rare to see a
    nice blog like this one today.

  7. My partner and I stumbled over here coming from
    a different web page and thought I might as well check things out.
    I like what I see so now i’m following you. Look forward
    to finding out about your web page again.

  8. Hello there! I could have sworn I’ve been to this site before
    but after reading through some of the post I realized it’s new to me.
    Anyways, I’m definitely happy I found it and I’ll be bookmarking and checking back frequently!

  9. I think this is one of the such a lot vital information for
    me. And i am glad studying your article. But wanna observation on some normal things, The
    website taste is perfect, the articles is truly excellent : D.
    Good process, cheers

  10. I enjoy what you guys are up too. Such clever work and coverage!
    Keep up the very good works guys I’ve incorporated you guys to

  11. It’s really a cool and helpful piece of info.
    I am happy that you simply shared this helpful information with us.
    Please keep us up to date like this. Thank you for sharing.

  12. Good day! I could have sworn I’ve visited this blog before but after going through some
    of the articles I realized it’s new to me. Nonetheless, I’m certainly
    pleased I discovered it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back regularly!

  13. Hey! Do you know if they make any plugins to assist with Search Engine Optimization? I’m
    trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but
    I’m not seeing very good gains. If you know of any please share.


  14. Thanks for your marvelous posting! I certainly enjoyed reading it, you may be
    a great author.I will ensure that I bookmark your blog and will eventually come back down the road.
    I want to encourage you to continue your great work, have a nice

  15. Pretty section of content. I just stumbled upon your website and in accession capital to
    assert that I get in fact enjoyed account your blog posts.
    Anyway I’ll be subscribing to your feeds and even I achievement you
    access consistently rapidly.

  16. I don’t know whether it’s just me or if everybody else encountering problems with your blog.
    It seems like some of the written text on your content are running off the screen.
    Can somebody else please comment and let me know if this
    is happening to them too? This could be a issue with my browser because
    I’ve had this happen before. Cheers

  17. Hmm it seems like your site ate my first comment (it was extremely long) so I guess I’ll
    just sum it up what I had written and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your
    blog. I as well am an aspiring blog writer but I’m
    still new to everything. Do you have any tips for first-time blog writers?
    I’d really appreciate it.

  18. Good day! Do you know if they make any plugins
    to assist with Search Engine Optimization? I’m trying to get my blog to
    rank for some targeted keywords but I’m not seeing very good gains.
    If you know of any please share. Kudos!

  19. This is really attention-grabbing, You’re a very skilled blogger.
    I’ve joined your rss feed and stay up for in the hunt
    for more of your great post. Additionally, I’ve shared your site in my
    social networks

  20. Hello! Someone in my Myspace group shared this website with us so I came to check it out.
    I’m definitely enjoying the information. I’m book-marking and will be tweeting this to my followers!

    Wonderful blog and fantastic design and style.

  21. I’m impressed, I must say. Seldom do I come across a
    blog that’s equally educative and interesting, and let me tell you,
    you’ve hit the nail on the head. The problem is an issue
    that too few people are speaking intelligently about.
    Now i’m very happy that I came across this during my
    hunt for something concerning this.

  22. Hi, i think that i saw you visited my blog so i came to “return the favor”.I’m attempting
    to find things to improve my web site!I suppose its ok to
    use a few of your ideas!!

  23. Google

    Wonderful story, reckoned we could combine several unrelated data, nevertheless really worth taking a look, whoa did 1 find out about Mid East has got far more problerms at the same time.

  24. I am not sure where you are getting your info, but great topic.
    I needs to spend some time learning more or understanding more.
    Thanks for great information I was looking for this info for my mission.

  25. Hey there are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m new to
    the blog world but I’m trying to get started and set up my own.
    Do you require any html coding expertise to make your own blog?

    Any help would be greatly appreciated!

  26. European

    […]we like to honor many other world wide web internet sites on the internet, even if they aren’t linked to us, by linking to them. Under are some webpages worth checking out[…]

  27. It is appropriate time to make some plans for the
    future and it’s time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I
    could I want to suggest you some interesting things or
    advice. Perhaps you can write next articles
    referring to this article. I desire to read more things
    about it!

  28. Excellent post. I was checking continuously this blog and
    I’m impressed! Extremely helpful information specifically the last part 🙂
    I care for such info much. I was seeking this particular info for a very long time.
    Thank you and best of luck.

  29. realistic giant dildo

    […]Wonderful story, reckoned we could combine a couple of unrelated data, nonetheless actually really worth taking a appear, whoa did a single find out about Mid East has got far more problerms at the same time […]

  30. power bullet vibe

    […]Wonderful story, reckoned we could combine a handful of unrelated information, nonetheless genuinely worth taking a look, whoa did one particular discover about Mid East has got a lot more problerms also […]

  31. vibrator

    […]very couple of web-sites that transpire to be comprehensive below, from our point of view are undoubtedly properly really worth checking out[…]

  32. goedkope ps4

    […]very couple of web-sites that take place to be comprehensive beneath, from our point of view are undoubtedly well really worth checking out[…]

  33. I just want to mention I’m all new to blogs and certainly savored you’re web site. More than likely I’m want to bookmark your site . You surely have good writings. Appreciate it for sharing your web page.

  34. I just want to say I am very new to blogs and truly savored you’re web site. More than likely I’m likely to bookmark your website . You amazingly come with superb articles and reviews. Regards for sharing your webpage.

  35. stocking

    […]Wonderful story, reckoned we could combine a handful of unrelated data, nevertheless genuinely really worth taking a appear, whoa did one particular discover about Mid East has got additional problerms at the same time […]

  36. Thanks for the marvelous posting! I truly enjoyed reading it, you
    can be a great author. I will make sure to bookmark your
    blog and will eventually come back in the foreseeable future.
    I want to encourage you to ultimately continue your great work, have a nice morning!

  37. Cialis

    […]check beneath, are some completely unrelated internet sites to ours, on the other hand, they are most trustworthy sources that we use[…]

  38. hundelegetøj

    […]Wonderful story, reckoned we could combine some unrelated information, nonetheless seriously worth taking a search, whoa did one particular master about Mid East has got additional problerms too […]

  39. Julia Ann Porn

    […]we like to honor many other web web-sites on the internet, even when they aren’t linked to us, by linking to them. Underneath are some webpages worth checking out[…]

  40. Have you ever considered creating an e-book or guest authoring on other sites?
    I have a blog based upon on the same topics you discuss and would love to have you share some stories/information. I know my audience would value your work.
    If you’re even remotely interested, feel free to
    send me an e-mail.

  41. 2-НДФЛ

    […]Every when in a although we decide on blogs that we study. Listed below would be the most current websites that we decide on […]

  42. I just want to say I’m new to weblog and definitely enjoyed you’re blog site. Most likely I’m want to bookmark your blog . You really come with outstanding posts. Cheers for sharing with us your blog site.

  43. I just want to mention I’m all new to blogs and certainly savored you’re web site. More than likely I’m want to bookmark your site . You surely have good writings. Appreciate it for sharing your web page.

  44. How long does a copyright last on newspaper articles?. . If a service copies newspapers articles and then posts it in a database on the Internet, is there also a copyright on the Internet content?.

  45. I think that everything wrote was very reasonable. But, what
    about this? suppose you wrote a catchier post title?
    I ain’t saying your content is not good., however what if you added a
    post title to maybe get people’s attention? I mean How do I know is he a Cheater?

    Yes or no? | The Wife Expert is kinda boring. You
    might look at Yahoo’s home page and see how they create news titles
    to get viewers to click. You might add a video or a
    related picture or two to get readers interested about everything’ve
    written. In my opinion, it could make your posts a little livelier.

  46. Great post. I was checking constantly this blog and I am impressed!
    Extremely helpful information specifically the last part 🙂 I care for such information much.
    I was looking for this particular information for
    a very long time. Thank you and good luck.

  47. Pretty good post. I just stumbled upon your website and wanted to say that I have incredibly enjoyed reading your blog posts. Any way I am going to be subscribing for the feed and I hope to visit your article once again soon.