Secret to Happy Marriage 1

They were an adorable black couple. Smiling.  Happy.  Joyful. Both were about 55 years old holding hands seated at the restaurant table waiting for their food. I approached them with a huge smile and wonderment.  “You both look so happy…how long have you been married?” I assumed they were married, I wasn’t even really sure if they were! The woman leaned back in her chair as if to be sure to give me her full attention. “We’ve been married 37 years.” My head said, “Holy friggin crap!”  But my mouth said, “Wow!!” I was fixed in wonderment, “Okay, you guys, how do you do that??” The woman again turned to me directly.  This time she bought her chin down and kept her eyes up as if looking at me over “grandma spectacles” but wore no glasses, and spoke really slow, “My husband loves God…” Oprah used to talk about those “Ah-ha” moments?  The ones where you finally “get it” and understand you’ve been staring at it this whole time and never noticed that was it?   This was mine. Ah-ha… I looked at her husband who was now leaning back in his chair and still hadn’t said a single word to me (including this moment too!), but this time all he did was nod his head toward his wife and smile. That’s when it happened…tears. They started and then wouldn’t stop.  They flowed from my eyes with no noise. Just water. Like someone had turned on a faucet.  And water poured out.  The couple noticed too and both of them sat up, a bit shocked and confused…clearly wondering how what they said affected me so much, as well as trying to figure out how they could help me. secret to marriageI don’t know where the tears came from but they were so hard to get them to stop. Such a sweet couple.  I can’t call them lucky because what have isn’t luck…it’s knowing what they need to do to stay connected.  The husband knows his wife is a vision on God and to respect his god he must treat his wife with the upmost care. And that he does.  I know, because I witnessed it.  And I saw what Gods love can bring to another. It’s not hard. You can have that. You can BE that. When you see your spouse…what if? What if you see them as if you see God?  Even when they are being horrible?  Especially if they are being horrible?!! Hmm……

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