“Will my cheating unfaithful spouse husband or wife ever get over their affair partner?” is the question almost every single visitor to my site has thought or asked. Specially if I get on a call with them and their worries or fears come pouring out….and even more so after their spouse has returned or come back after the affair has ended…or not ended.
The whole cheating / affair idea and happening just sucks. It’s so stupid and causes so much pain to so many people. And for what? You didn’t sign up for this did you? You didn’t get married thinking you would ever have to deal with this ridiculous mess.
And taking that thought above just a step back further, it allows you to separate yourself from your partner to the point where you realize the affair they have had with some stranger or someone you know…. is NMP. Not your problem. It is theirs. They made the mess. They made the drama. They get to live in their hell.
Even if you were mean or unkind to the point where you are questioning maybe it’s your fault your spouse cheated because you believe they had an affair on you to get revenge and now you feel bad now…? Um…wel…I’m here to tell you – it’s still not your problem. They made the choice to cross the line. They made the decision. Not you. You may have been mean and you may have been a bitch, and I teach you how to apologize- the right way – which you need to do anyway, but bottom line, you had zero to do with their choice.
Are we clear?
Now that we have come to an agreement that this is not your fault. It is not up to you to make sure your husband or wife gets over their affair partner. Especially in the time you have decided that they should get over it. Let’s be real: Everyone deals with pain and loss in their own way. Same thing with death. Many of your spouses may have gone into a midlife crisis because someone has died. And they didn’t know how to handle it or how to turn to you for help and instead looked toward a complete stranger or someone they knew… for plain old comfort and support. A person with whom they felt comfortable to look weak without judgment or criticism or being told what to do or how to feel.
Just today, a lovely wife I have been coaching for the past year, sent me the below video. Normally I don’t have time to watch all of the lovely things people send me, but since I have this horrid cold, I had a few minutes and the topic caught my attention. So I watched it. The whole thing. Not only did I like the delivery of the guy talking, I liked what he was saying. Because he sounded truthful. And honest. I like authenticity. That’s how I roll. That’s what we need more of in this world. People speaking the truth. About what really happens during an affair and after. And how difficult it is for the person who had the affair to let go of their addiction. Because that’s what it is. A “High,” a drug, like tequila, or Porn, or gambling.
And the affair becomes an addiction. The married partner in the affair becomes addicted to the affair not because he or she actually likes the other person or is in love with the other person, it is because he or she becomes addicted to the affair due to the “high” they feel when they are with that person. Without any ties to reality, the affair is a made up fantasy and the addiction grows because in the fantasy both partners can be whoever they want to be…and that freedom from reality feels good. And that’s what makes it addicting.
Below is the video she sent me. Watch it. And like he says in the video, “Don’t hit the share button too soon…!” Save it! Or set up a call with me to see how you can best share it with your spouse so he or she can HEAR you and your intentions. Email me at TheWifeExpert@gmail.com and we can set up a time to chat.
Thanks for coming to my site and please let me know how I can help you bring your husband or wife home to your family! ❤️❤️
How Can I Help You...Right NOW?!
What to do when they Leave!
How to get them Home!
TWO Group Coaching Classes a month!
AND access to me!
(A MUST for every wife or husband facing a spouse in Midlife Crisisl!)
Help, Advice, Support!
So you feel Strong & Confident
That what you are doing will work!
Your Secret Weapon!
Direct Personal Guidance to help you Navigate the chaos of his Midlife Crisis!
(Wives I coach LOVE this!)