How do we know how Our Man, or any man, feels?
We don’t.
We don’t know. We won’t know. Unless we ASK.
And during crazy MLC….do we ask, “Hey, how do you feel?”
NEVER.
Why?
Because they don’t know.
They have NO IDEA.
And if you ask, you will bring them stress and if they feel stress while you are with them, who do you think they will blame???
Bob?
Nope. YOU.
Sometimes men will know how they feel at that very moment. They feel angry that you asked! And when the wife (who they believe is the source of their biggest problem) asks them about anything (anything at all!) during this time, they feel trapped, unloved and that someone (you) is blocking them from finding true happiness….(“if she would be gone, I’d be happy”).
So if you imagine all the thoughts rolling around in their head (the noodles), (signup for the videos to learn all about the Noodles and More!) then you walk over and speak up and say, “Hey, how do you feel…?” You will get an answer that may not be very kind to you. Or truthful to you. Or Truthful to them.
Because they don’t know. They don’t know why men cheat. They don’t know why they are cheating on you. They don’t know why men stray. They don’t even really truly know why they left you. They do know they “had’ to do it.
They are confused.
Lost.
Out of their body.
Also – the word “FEEL” is taken as an intrusion on their personal mind space. And since the noodles (see the detailed videos on membership site to learn all about the noodles and more!) are taking over their brain, these men do everything they can to stop “feeling” and start “doing”. Which is “leaving” or “Moving” away from you. And we don’t want that.
If you catch them on a “good” day, the “how do you feel” question will be answered with any pieces of the following:
“I feel great! I don’t want to be married. I’m sorry to hurt you. I just want different things than you. You are not a bad person. I just need to do something for myself after doing all these things for you or the family.”
(right?)
Of course you hear these words and fall apart, “AHHH!! He’s leaving me forever…I have lost my husband! Our marriage is over!! My kids will be in therapy, they will be screwed up and my family will never reconcile!”
It’s terrifying. And the drama we create ourselves in our own heads is enough to keep our husbands in MLC forever. And that’s why I am here.
Remember? It happened to me! It immobilized me and put me in bed for days. I believe my kids (aged 13, 9 and 6) ate pizza, pasta & P&J for 3 months straight. I’m not even sure. What I AM sure about…? It was worth it to get to this side. I had to go through that hell to get to be the person I am today. Wiser, smarter, worldly and well…funny…but I’ve always been funny. (Now I’m funnier about another topic I know really well.) I’m also a better wife. A better Mom. A better Friend. A better human. Oh and a better Catholic! You don’t go through something like this without seeing God everywhere you look.
Going Straight…
That’s why I push you into the phrase: “Stay Straight!” You know what your role is in your marriage. Remember you once promised, “Till Death do we part.” Hello? You know what you have to do. You know what you may have done wrong. Figure it out. Then change it. And if you have trouble – reach out to me and I will walk you through this mess. You are not alone! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Check out the below…And LOOK at the photo…really SEE what is there…
The man doesn’t know that there is a snake underneath.
The woman doesn’t know that there is a stone crushing the man.
The woman thinks: “I am going to fall! and I can’t climb because the snake is going to bite me! Why can’t the man use a little more strengh and pull me up!”
The man thinks: “I am in so much pain! Yet I’m still pulling you as much as I can! Why can’t you try and climb a little harder?!”
The moral is: You can’t see the pressure the other person is under, and the other person can’t see pain that you’re in.
This is life, no matter whether it’s with work, family, feelings or friends we should try to understand each other. Learn to think differently, perhaps more clearly and communicate better. A little thought and patience goes a long
way.
To see the Creator of the photo above:
https://www.linkedin.com/posts/deanseddoncom_business-marketing-leadership-activity-6824219630081462272-Va6I/
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