How I Survived His Midlife Crisis…

I remember the days after the bomb exploded (there was no “dropping”). My world imploded and I was forced into this horrid reality. My husband, my 25 plus year best friend for life, had now found his soul mate and was leaving me for her and I was to living a horrid nightmare.

Bring on “the daze”….my fog. Lasting weeks? Months? I’m not even sure. But there were angels. Many. Two that come to mind right here for this article.

One, hilarious girl. She joined me in romp to Vegas. The husband (mine) had a free trip there and now that the “girl” and his “truth” was exposed, he couldn’t possibly join me on a fun trip to Cesars Palace to see Celine Dion pour her love out for her own husband first hand. So I had to find a replacement (because sad or not), no way in hell was I missing a fun free trip to Vegas and see Celine. But no one could go with me…until….

A friend I spoke with, she couldn’t go…nor could many of my mom friends. But Janelle thought outside the box and told me, “Stacy! Let’s call her! She’ll go! She’s a blast! She will shift you!” (Stacy won’t care that I use her real name. Divorced. Blonde. And willing to attend a 3-day binge in Vegas with a girl who, 3 weeks earlier found out her life ended as she knew it.)

It was clear: “Stacy will go…she’s been through this cheating thing, and will help you rid your thoughts of your husband forever.”

“Okay…” I was open for anything that would help ease my pain.

That full story is coming soon….

The 2nd angel is a woman who I didn’t know at all either. Her name is Chris. She had kids younger than me, and I literally overheard her in the school parking street say outloud that she was going away for the long weekend.

I blurted out, “Oh! Can I come?”

Her response, “Sure!”

That was it! I bit and she helped. She quickly knew my story and within a few days I was in her car with her two kids and my two youngest driving north to some….I wasn’t even sure. But I needed it. I needed an escape. A massive break from this mental torture called, “MY LIFE.”

Just yesterday a memory from Facebook popped up on my phone. It was a photo of my kids and her kids and her wonderful husband. An Aussie guy who loved the outdoors. He had us fishing, hiking, walking every moment of those 3 days. And it was an unbelievable happy time. And by the way, Mr Aussie guy? He didn’t know me either. I, and my kids, were total strangers to him. And look what he did. Treated us like family? I am truly humbled.

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Being in nature and feeling free. “I can control my life.” Was the underlying thought pressing me. Of course the other thought cried out like a baby: “I don’t not want to do life without my husband!!” However, at that moment, the big girl pants that I was forced to put on understood this horrid reality, that choice wasn’t mine. He had left. He said he didn’t want me. Now all the rest is up to me. What am I going to do?

Leave? Divorce? Wait? WTF???

I’m so glad I figured out this way…the way I teach in my classes above.

I am honored and blessed when I think about those two women. I owe them more than they will ever know. For inconveniencing their own lives for the sake of me.

Two total strangers. Who are not strangers any longer.

God bless anyone that gives the gift of love and kindness when called.

If you need help…don’t go through this alone…Click now….I am here….

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